Now you need to go and read Day 2 in your book or on the KLOVE Blog...
"Kindness is love in action..." Did you see that? Explaining kindness is difficult for me - other than saying it is being nice to others. I think I will definitely be posting this up on my mirror... Maybe even get some wall art for my walls with this phrase. It is something that I think we all could look at daily... :o)
My goal has always been that of a Proverbs 31 woman. I want my children and husband to consider themselves blessed to have me as a wife and mother. Having kindness on my tongue is the only way that is going to happen. It is not only being kind in my actions, but my tongue as well. That is the hardest part for me and I am sure that must be a struggle for most otherwise the book of Proverbs wouldn't be filled with verses about the power of the tongue. The verse that has always stuck in the forefront of my mind is Proverbs 15:4, "The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit." I want my tongue to be one that brings healing and speaks life into my family. I also know that the bible says the tongue is "a restless evil full of deadly poison" - it has the power to not only hurt deeply, but even destroy. Proverbs 18:21 says, "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit." It has the power of life and death! I want to be the wise woman who speaks life to those around me - loving my neighbors as myself. Who are my neighbors? Anyone around me... including my family! James 1:26 says, "If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless." That tight rein is not just what we do in public, but what we demonstrate at home with our family as well. :o)
On the kindness scale, how would your family rate you? Ouch?! How harsh are your words and actions? How gentle and helpful are you? Parenting doesn't require harshness. Disciplining children is far more effective when done without yelling and screaming. It is about capturing their heart - not turning it into a heart of stone. The goal is for our children to WANT to obey their parents. Not only through their actions, but inwardly as well. You do that by capturing their heart. If you want to raise children that will not rebel when they get to their teen years, then you need to have their heart! You do this by building relationship with them. You spend time doing things TOGETHER. You are patient and kind. A great book on this subject is Shepherding a Child's Heart by Dr. Ted Tripp. Being patient and kind does not mean there are not boundaries and that there are not consequences for the times when they purposefully go out of those boundaries.
Children! Teens! You too can change the tone and direction of your family with your kindness. Being kind to your siblings and parents... through your actions and words. Being a kind person is the person that everyone wants to be with including your family! Honoring your parents by not speaking disrespectfully, but with kindness. :o)
So who goes first? If you are currently in a household where a kind word is rarely spoken, how do you change that? You go first! Don't wait for everyone else. They will follow your lead... Even if you are the child - go for it! It is very hard to demonstrate love and kindness when you don't "feel" like it. It is a very dangerous place to be in when we allow our feelings to dictate our lives. We control our feelings, they don't control us! How many families and marriages could be saved if people would stop letting their feelings have complete control over them. You have a choice whether to let words and actions hurt you. You have a choice whether to run with your feelings or do what is right. In today's reading the very last paragraph says this, "It is difficult to demonstrate love when you feel little to no motivation. But love in its truest sense in not based on feelings. Rather, love determines to show thoughtful actions even when there seems to be no reward. you will never learn to love until you learn to demonstrate kindness."
In my opinion there is no greater reward here on earth than being loved and loving... However, you have to demonstrate kindness if you want to have that love in your life... So today's dare - In addition to saying nothing negative to your family again today, do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
I should also emphasize how important it is to journal through these 40 days. I highly encourage and recommend it. Ask yourself today or tomorrow morning - What discoveries about love did I make today? What specifically did I do in this dare? How did I show kindness?
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